Learn To Speak Up and Get Your Needs Met
If you have a hard time speaking up, sharing what is in your heart or on your mind, this post is for you. If you find yourself censoring what you want or need to say so much that by the time you open your mouth to speak nothing comes out, this post is for you. If you believe you can't speak your truth for fear of being judged or rejected, this post is for you.
When you (and I could also say we because I am right here with you) develop a pattern of not speaking your truth it is often because you believe the approval of others is more important than the approval of yourself and expressing your needs. Also when you are overly worried about being judged you are mentally in someone else's space. You are not fully present and therefore not embodying your own energy.
Yet, when you release the need for others' approval you will begin to get your energy and power back. You will develop inner-confidence, self-esteem and self-love. And you will more likely get your needs met; or discover you having been trying to get them met through the wrong channels.
It takes tremendous courage, honestly and fearless self-reflection to discover the root of any problem and find a new way of living that guides you toward your ideals.
The way to change a pattern is to mindfully and skillfully practice doing something new and different. Here is a simple process to use when you are ready to speak up and let your truth be heard:
- Pick a situation that is difficult to share.
- Write down what you want to share (take some time to write it down and be as detailed and thorough as you can. Here you get the opportunity to be really clear on how you want to express yourself).
- Set your intention (how do you want to feel in the conversation? What is the best case scenario? visualize and see the best-case-scenario play out in your mind: This is a vital part).
- Take 5 deep breaths in and out. (as you do, breath in for a count of 4, 5 or 6 nice and slow and then slowly exhale out any stress, worry, fear or negativity you have around this conversation).
- Be kind to yourself. Send compassion to yourself whenever you feel afraid of judgement or rejection. (you can always use the loving kindness mantra: May I be happy. May I be well. May I be free from suffering.
- Have the conversation
I hope you find this helpful. If you do please share with your friends & family. I'd also really like to hear from you! Share in the comments some of the things you find most difficult to talk about? What is your fear when you consider speaking your truth? How has speaking up helped you become happier and stronger?